Starting out with a pun should tell you what this blog is going to be like.
Not the only thing that’s queer…
My name is Charlie, the Anglican Queer, or AQ. I’m a queer identified Anglican originally from the United States, now living in Australia with my partner and our cat, Muddy.
I was raised in a tradition Anglican diocese based out of California where my father was a parish priest for twenty years. My parents chose to homeschool myself and my younger brother for religious reasons. After completing high school, I applied and was accepted at Creighton University, a Jesuit university in Omaha, Nebraska, which I attended until 2013.
In 2010, I came out as a lesbian and as genderqueer just a couple of years later.
Yes, I do not have a plan.
Faith and spirituality are the stated purpose of this blog, but it is also a place of openness and acceptance for those who are searching. Whether you are trying to figure out what God and faith mean to you, or about gender and sexuality, or a combination of the two, this is a place where that can happen. I write about these topics regularly because they are important, not just to others, but to me personally.
At the most personal level I’m using this blog as a public place where I can be completely open about the two most important parts of my life – gayness and faith. It’s taken me awhile to understand, but the two are not mutually exclusive. If anything, they are closely related and in my life and my writing I want to try and explore that relationship. This is a place where I can let my ideas roam free, so if they seem random or unrelated, well, that’s just my brain and how it works. So really, there’s no plan to this and there probably won’t ever be.
And here’s the plan!
That being said, there is a certain amount of logic to how this blog works. There will be three regular posts per week (Monday, Wednesday, Friday). I am committed to keeping this blog as current as possible. For the most part, I try to keep a theme running from week to week. The reason for this is to allow my brain to fully understand a topic and to reflect on it as completely as possible.
Coming out of the closet. Again.
As LGBT individuals, we are used to the idea of coming out of the closet. It’s a part of our identity even a part of our “gay culture.” Coming out is an integral step in many LGBT people’s lives and we understand the strength and courage it takes to do it. Coming out is celebrated, as it should be.
But what other closets are we living in?
After coming out as gay I felt so free, but I soon began to live in a completely different dark space altogether. Many of the LGBT people I knew were vehemently anti-Christian, a viewpoint I ended up sharing after awhile. It was easy to be opposed to religion when it was opposed to me. Still something in me never really felt like that was where I was supposed to be. Faith was just as innate to me as my orientation and in accepting one, I was forced to reject the other. Christians told me I couldn’t be gay and Christian. Gay people told me I couldn’t be Christian and gay. Eventually, the faith side of me went into hiding and I was in a closet once again.
Coming to understand that I was hiding an important part of myself took awhile. The longer I denied being a person of faith, the more unsettled I felt. I had to bring the two together in order to be a whole person. Once I had done this, I decided to come out for the second time.
I’m gay and I’m a Christian. I don’t believe that I have to choose between those things. I don’t know how many other people have felt this way or have been made to feel this way by the people in their lives. I kind of feel like there’s more than you would suspect. So this is a space for people who feel like that.